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Recovering from major surgery

I feel like I’m broken, and an invalid, and yet my mind doesn’t connect what my body feels. In my mind i am fine, perfectly healthy, and ready to do what I need to do, want to do, should be doing, am normally doing. BUT my body is not quite ready for my normal routine. Not that my normal routine is major, but it’s definitely too much for someone who just had major surgery less than a week ago.

“Baby, what are you doing?” my husband asks as I lean down to pick up the dirty clothes off the floor.

I look up at him with what I know is a confused expression on my face and see the reprimand in his face as I look back down at the pile of dirty clothes. I am not supposed to be picking things up like that, nor am I supposed to wash dishes, sweep, mop, drive, lift anything more than a gallon of milk or a bag of sugar. According to my husband, I am not to lift a finger to do any type of housework what-so-ever at all. But right now he is in his (big) truck letting it warm up and I am sipping coffee and writing this. I made coffee this morning, but that’s only because he was snoozing, trying to get that extra ten minutes of sleep before having to get up–when he woke up and realized I’d made coffee he “fussed” at me.

I feel like an invalid. It’s nice to be waited on, to a point, but after that point it becomes frustrating. Not only is my husband still working and can’t be expected to do everything, and my son can help some, but I should be able to do for myself–simple things at least, yet I KNOW that there are some things I cannot do, should not do so that I can heal properly, but damn I should be able to make a pot of coffee, or throw a few clothes in the washer but then that means putting them in the dryer and then taking them out of the dryer. I get it. I do.

I’ll be so glad when I am healed enough to take care of myself-myself. When I can do dishes–I know, I can’t believe I said that, who the hell wants to do dishes? But it’s better when you have the option, at least. If I ‘m not doing dishes because I don’t want to or don’t feel like it’s different than when you cannot, aren’t supposed to, or aren’t allowed. Thank goodness for my wonderful husband and family.

I never thought I’d miss doing housework, but damn if I don’t.

 
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Posted by on February 16, 2015 in life

 

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It’s been a while I know

Not that the blogosphere cares one way or the other if I, one little minuscule person in the grander scheme of things, posts on my blog or not, but I’ve been so busy writing, posting on my writer blog that I’d forgotten about my personal blog until I saw a comment that I needed to approve show up in my email. Whoa! Damn, has it been that long since I posted on my other blog?…I asked myself, and the answer was–I couldn’t remember the last time I posted anything to this one, which made me feel guilty as hell.

I’ve often wondered if I ought to combine the two blogs into one blog with different pages: one page for the personal stuff and one page for the writing stuff… Hmmm. something to think about in the new year. Maybe when I finally decide to purchase my own site I’ll do that. Then I’ll have to come up with a whole new name, one that encompasses both.

So what has been going on? It’s a whole new year first of all. Can you believe it’s already 2015? I can’t. The time just passes by way to quickly–What happened to the time? seems to be a reoccurring theme in my life since I hit 30+, and now that I’m 40+ it’s worse.

I got a new hairdo. End of 2014 034

Mr. Rockstar has been busy with his new job. And I’ve been going out with him most of the time when he has to go out Over the Road. We’ve been to places like West Virginia, Ohio, Maryland, Virginia, Georgia, North Carolina, Kentucky, Alabama…I have such a good time when I go out OTR with him, and I usually get a lot of writing done.

Speaking of writing, I’ve been writing. And I won NaNoWriMo back in November.

I’ve been working on lots of DIY projects around our house.

I’ve also been vlogging (if you check out my other blog you’ll see some of the videos there.), which is completely new to me. I started vlogging for NaNoWriMo and have stuck with it thus far. It’s been great. I’ve met so many writer friends. 😀

The Little Man and Mr. Rockstar in the Big Truck...

The Little Man and Mr. Rockstar in the Big Truck…

My grandson turns 2 1/2 on the 15th of this month…He is so absolutely adorable. I love that kid more and more… so much it makes my heart feel like it’s going to burst in my chest, and I’m just so proud of my daughter–she is one hell of a mom. And she’s doing well in college, and now has a part-time job. not to mention the fact that she’s a great daughter and person. I am one proud Mom!

As a Mom it’s such a joy when your children grow up and become more than just your child but your friend as well. And my daughter is one of my best friends and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Just like with my husband, Mr. Rockstar, he is truly one of my best friends–he would tell you the same about me. I think that’s one of the reasons we have such a wonderful, happy marriage.

I’ve also been busy because my cousin L who was in my wedding is getting married and I’m going to be her matron of honor. I already have my dress. I love the color scheme she chose. Dark blue (midnight blue) and silver (mercury).

Matron of Honor Dress...

Matron of Honor Dress…

My hair is cut now, so it’ looks different, and I’m pretty sure I’m going to wear it up for her wedding, but I absolutely love my dress. We got to choose our dress. It had to be one of two materials, basically, and they all have to be same color, but the choice of dress was up to us. I chose this one, and since I’m the oldest person in the wedding I thought it suited me best–didn’t want to get something that was too young looking or too old looking…

Now it’s time for me to start working on her bachelorette party stuff, and her bridal shower stuff. What to do, what to do? Hmmm. 24 hours of girl stuff… Hmmm! Mani and Pedi, hair, drinks, that kind of thing–at least for the two of us. I’m going to treat her to a “girls day,” but for all of us girls what??? My mind is making internal lists as I type. A stripper just isn’t her thing I don’t think, so I’ve got to come up with something else fun.

And on that note, since I now have a mental image of Mark Wahlberg and Channing Tatum in my mind I’m going to go. Hope everyone had a great New Years Eve and Happy New Year!

 
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Posted by on January 1, 2015 in around here, life

 

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Rainy Days

In my writing room

In my writing room

As soon as Mr. Rockstar/Mr. Trucker Driver calls me and his mom are headed to Columbia to pick him up. He left Alabama, near Montgomery, sometime this morning and is headed home. I’m excited to say the least. Wishing we could have spent this cold, rainy day together snuggling on the couch watching movies or cooking a meal together or spending the day with our grandson (who is actually visiting his dad and his aunt this weekend but you know what I mean)…instead I’ll get part of the day with him, and tonight, and tomorrow, but he’ll probably be headed back out Monday. 😦

Cold, gray, and rainy day

Cold, gray, and rainy day

I’m dressed and ready, drinking coffee, and writing while I wait on his call. That seems to be the life of the wife of a truck driver, always waiting for them to call and to come home. I don’t mind. My ex husband was in the Navy and gone for 3 months at a time on a submarine so I know all about the waiting game and I’d much rather only wait a week than 3 months or more. It really makes you think, though. All those people who have jobs that take them away from their families…They do their jobs yet many of them have the jobs that seem to be the least appreciated ones. Big high five for all of those who have jobs that take them away from their families.

And a soldier!!!!

And a soldier!!!!

Here in SC, there is still leftover snow left on the ground, which means I know there is still snow and ice left over in other southern states that were hit with the snow storm. I’m sure this snow storm was nothing compared to what the people get up north or other places where it snows in a normal basis, but here in the south it’s actually the ice we have to worry about and since we don’t get snow on an even semi-regular basis our roads aren’t made for it, nor are we prepared for it, and unfortunately there a lot of people who don’t know how to drive in it. I’m just thankful it’s passed. I’m also thankful that my husband made it safely to his destination and is now on his way home.

Left over snow and ice in SC after storm

Left over snow and ice in SC after storm

We have left over snow in our yard, on our roof, and porch, as well as ice. I almost busted my ass walking down the steps to take the picture. LOL! Next year this time our house will be painted an entirely different color, thank goodness. I’m excited about it! White with black shutters and a (dark) red door. Hope everyone has a great day/weekend. Be safe!!!

 
 

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A Trucker’s Wife

proud to be a trucker's wife

My husband left today… I dropped him off at his truck and he’s headed towards Charleston (SC) and then Alabama. Right in the middle of all of this bad weather we’re getting down South, after having left all that snow from last week. With less than 48 hours off he is back on the road. Makes me sad and frustrated, to say the least.

My dad, who used to a truck driver back in the late 60’s and early 70’s, got my husband a coffee mug that plugs into the cigarette lighter so his coffee will stay warm. I made a fresh pot of coffee so he could take a mug on the road with him, figured that was the least I could do. But it’s not enough. Not sure that as much as I try to do for him it will ever be enough for all that he does and goes through just to provide for us. I’m so thankful for him.

I’ll write a more in depth post soon about a trucker’s life, with a few suggestions in regard to movies, etc… But for now I’m going to drink my cup of coffee, finish packing my overnight bag so I can go stay at my in-law’s to wait out the storm that is coming. Hope all is well with those who are experience bad weather. Stay Safe and Warm!!!

bless my trucker on the road

 

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IT’S BEEN AWHILE…

So things have been crazy around here. Tumors (that I still have but have finally eased up some). Pinched nerve in my shoulder blade (for 2 months now and has caused me limited mobility in my right arm–and wouldn’t you know I’m right handed).

I’m still here. Still kicking. But I’ve taken a break. I’m not publishing on my author blog http://burgesstaylor7911.wordpress.com/

According to everything I’ve read authors/writer’s should brand themselves…So that’s what I’ve done. For those of you who are more interested in the writing stuff that would be the blog to follow. This one is more personal…

Things are better. My son will leave for bootcamp the end of December (he joined the Army). My husband starts a new job on October 20th. My grandson started daycare one week ago and loves it. He’s getting so big. He’ll be fifteen months old on the 15th. My daughter has her two year degree and is working on another degree and working. And me, well I’m writing, trying to get well, organizing the house on my good days, and spending time with family. I babysat my grandson the whole month of August while his father was out of town so I was extremely busy that month–that’s when the pinched nerve started…

I’ll be doing NaNoWriMo in November and am trying really hard to write an outline now so that I’m prepared and don’t get lost at the midpoint of my novel like last year.

I’ve also been catching up on television shows and movies via Netflix. (Big fan of Netflix)

Well, I can’t promise I’ll write every day, but I’ll be writing at least once a week. Hope all of you are well.

 

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Anniversaries, love, and writing

Two years ago my husband and I went out on our first date on July 9th. We’d met weeks before, and had several mutual friends, but that date changed things for both of us. Between waiting hours to eat and then a flat tire on the way home we both realized that the other person was someone we wanted to get to know better, enjoyed spending time around, and that is exactly what we did–spend time together and get to know each other. We became best friends and our attraction to each other grew. By January 16th we got engaged. We’d been together for 6 months and 1 week when we got engaged. We planned our wedding for September 8th, 2012. Nothing fancy. An outdoor wedding and reception and my parents home. A barbecue reception, real barbecue (my dad and uncle and cousin barbecued a hog) and family fixing’s (several of my family members brought dishes) and one of my Aunt’s made our cake and cupcakes.  (OMG they were delicious!) Everyone loved the food. Everyone loved the ceremony. And even the 20 minutes worth of rain that came out of the sky from nowhere at the very beginning of our outdoor reception didn’t keep people from enjoying themselves.

We’ve been married 10 months today, and together for 2 years tomorrow. So it’s all about anniversaries right now. I can’t believe how fast it has all passed by. It feels like I’ve known him for a lifetime yet it doesn’t feel like it’s been 2 years already.  Love, real love, at least to me, seems to be so calming, yet so exciting at the same time. I am happier than I’ve ever been. Regardless of the pain I’m in (that I hide the depth of from my husband so he doesn’t worry so much) or the fact that because I’m not working having only one income really puts a burden on him, and things are stressful–I really do need to find a job–we’re both the happiest we’ve ever been.

Happiness isn’t about what you have, but appreciating what you have. My grandson will be one next Monday–I’m going to miss the baby stuff, after this birthday there’s no stopping him. He’ll start walking soon, he’s already standing by  himself some. And he’s talking, and playing, and learning everything so quickly. Before long he’ll be in kindergarten and I’ll be wondering where all the time went.  Then again, I can’t believe my children are 25 and 21, and that I’ll be 46 on the 23rd of this month.

I’m writing a book for July’s CampNaNoWriMo. So far so good, but I’m still not onto the book that I know will be the “one.” I’m getting there though. I’ve read several books on from my Amazon Kindle that had errors, mistakes, etc and I know that when I finally do publish I really don’t want that in my book. As a reader, I pick up on them and if there’s one or two it doesn’t bother me so much, but if there are a lot then my attitude is one of “Put the book down and wait until it’s finished to read” because if it has that many errors in it then it isn’t really finished. Sometimes, when we’re in a rush we make errors, and sometimes our minds work faster than our hands can type, but it’s different if it’s a published book. Shouldn’t an editor have picked up on that stuff. Unless it is self published, then your own inner editor has an even harder job to do. I don’t think I want to self publish. I want to go the old fashioned route and send my manuscript off, await the numerous rejection letters that will come in the mail, and hope that at least one person out there in the land of books to be published reads my manuscript and thinks “This is good…this has potential…I want to talk to this person…(or even) by George, this is it!”

Oh well, let me get back to re-organizing the guest room now that my wonderful husband has taken the double bed out of there and put up the twin bed so we can put my desk back in there and I finally have my own room to write and create in. I don’t mind having the desk in our bedroom but it really does make the room crowded.

 

 

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Assil…or Lissa Backwards in Bizarro World

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need coffee now

The Daily Prompt: The Bizarro World

In the DC comics universe, a planet called “Htrae” (“Earth” spelled backwards) is populated with bizarre versions of superheroes. A Seinfeld episode made the idea of this Bizarro World popular, where the characters encountered their opposite selves.

Craft a scene in which you meet an opposite version of yourself — or a story in a bizarre, backwards world.

 Meeting the opposite version of myself, sort of like How I Met My Mother’s doppelganger episodes, would be interesting. Everywhere I’ve lived at least one person has said, “Hey, don’t I know you?” or “You look just like…” even my husband saw what he swears is my doppelganger. So as I sit here contemplating my opposite version of myself I can’t help but wonder if she’d be my twin physically but my opposite personality wise… So that’s how I’m going to take it.
Assil would be an extroverted introvert. She’d be the life of the party! She’d be physically fit (since right now I’m in chronic pain that sounds so wonderful) and run marathons. She’d have OCD instead of ADHD, and her entire house would be organized and spotless. She’d be a published author and photographer. She would not procrastinate, and she’d never be late. But she’d be single and lonely. She’d live in the city in a fancy loft with too many casual friends and no real friends. She’d travel all over the place and love the sights and sounds but she’d have no one except her audience to share it with. She wouldn’t have to worry about whether she needed to choose between buying a whole weeks worth of groceries, putting gas in the car, or going to the doctor and getting medication. She wouldn’t have to worry about anyone but herself but there would be no one worrying about her, except her agent who just wants to make sure everything is on schedule.
I could go on…But the truth is I like me. I actually love me. Flaws and all. I am as fit as I can be considering I’m in constant pain. I have a husband and family who love me. My husband and most of my family actually appreciate me and enjoy my company. (Notice I said most, I’m living in the real world and I know that my ramblings, quick change of topic, tardiness, ADHD, and lack of real organizational skills do get on some people’s nerves on occasion.) I have finally started working on my dream and am writing a book. I’ve got an awesome starter camera (it’s a Canon PowerShot SX150IS) that was a birthday gift last year from my amazing and wonderful husband, whom I call Mr. Rockstar because he has the most amazing voice (he was in a band when we met: lead singer and guitar player). He has no idea of talented he really is. I have a beautiful and wonderful 9 month old grandson who lights up my world every time I even think about his sweet face. Mr. Rockstar actually likes my cooking. And I have coffee!  I have wonderful friends that I love, care about, and appreciate and who feel the same way about me. The life that we dream or imagine when we’re young, or when we’re having a bad day and think, “If only I could…” or “If only I were…” is often like that cliche… The grass is not always greener on the other side…
grass is greener
No, I’m happy being me. I don’t want or need to be anything different than what, who, and how I am.
 

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